Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Challenge #16 *Sponsored* + Winner!

Your Love Hurts Me

It's funny how people hurt the ones they love the most.
Sometimes is it so toxic you have to cut them off, sometimes you
can handle it but it's a daily struggle, sometimes you just avoid it
altogether. This challenge is all about those who love to hurt you
or just blindly hurt you while saying "I love you".
No it might not be intentional, but it still hurts.
Maybe it's the sister who constantly says how horrible your
children are, or the friend who always criticizes your weight.
Or the parent who only sees their child who makes mistakes
and does not acknowledge your accomplishments.
It's ok to see the pain, and it's ok to still love them.
It's therapeutic to be aware!

Now go get Dirty!

as this month's SPONSOR!

Scrappy Jo's has offered up a 20.00 Gift Certificate!!
on challenge #16!~
We work hard to make sure you
have prizes to play for so please
do visit Scrappy Jo's!
They also have a blog!

*used Keller's Creations (sponsor) materials for this mini-tag-album*
Journaling reads:
I've never understood your reasons for maintaining your DISTANCE from me, not showing any interest in my life, or much support over the years. I know you were a victim of neglect from your own parents, so you should know how BAD it feels to be PUSHED away from someone you love. I still hope there will come a day when we could grow closer and you'll actually WANT to get to know me or be a part of my life. Your distance has really HURT me over the years, and has messed up my self-esteem. I WISH we could have a normal father-daughter relationship. It won't work if you keep your distance.

**I used Keller's Creations(Sponsor) on this layout. The Big Chipboard Circle, background Pattern Paper,Chipboard Heart and Heart shaped red paper and the cream circle behind the heart are all from the Sponsor!!Thank You so much!!
Journaling Says:
How could you be so cruel and call him such mean
names...your his aunt and your suppose to love
and support him unconditionally!! I told you it was a
phase he was going through, but seriously he was only
a toddler and just being a boy!! I have forgiven you, but I
will never forget how hurtful you were!! 12/03


**LO created with wonderful product from our July sponsor Keller's Creations. Thank you so much :)
Having a child at 18 really puts into perspective who your true friends are in life. There were a few people who I had thought were forever friends, but as soon as I had a child and was nolonger able to be the 'Amy' I once was, they distanced themselves from me. What hurt the most is that they still claim to be one of my best friends. All the while talking crap behind my back. I overlooked it over and over. Guess What? NO MORE 'one more chances' with me. YES!!! I had a child at a very young age. Do I regret it? Hell NO! It caused me to finally grow up and learn to appreciate life so much more. I'm actually sorry our friendship is over, but having people in my life that don't support me when they said they always would is not something I want. I want my kids to value friendship - TRUE friendship. You hurt me far too many times. NO MORE.


With the exception of Devin, falling in love with you was probably the worst thing I have ever done. And I loved you - probably still do! I loved you SOOOO much! You were the world to me. Yes, we made mistakes - both of us, but that didn’t change my love for you. You always were a drinker. When your mother passed away, you drank and drank and drank. Every day. I don’t even think you saw it. We had that arguement....you were 100% sure you didn’t drink every day. You got out of work and went to the bar to drink until it was time to pick me up. You could have spent that time with your son. You could have picked him up early and had one-on-one time with him...but you didn’t. You had to go to the bar instead. Then you would pick me up and drop Devin and I at home and then go back to the bar and pretty much stay there Thanksgiving was the last straw. You left right after the meal and were still at the bar at midnight. Someobdy else had taken us home You were so ticked off because you knew you couldn’t drive yourself and didn’t know why I had gone home without you. I’ll tell you why - because our son was two and needed to be in bed!!!! Somebody ELSE cared more about his well being than you did. The alcohol was more important than me or your son. Two days later I did something I promised I would never do to anybody...I gave you an ultimatum. It was either me and your son or the alcohol. You never responded. You then left me the note to call you that day or you’d pack up your stuff and go. I had to FIGHT not to pick up that phone and call you. It’s one of the hardest things I had ever done. I loved you, but you loved the alochol more. I didn’t want your son growing up thinking that this is what life should be. So I didn’t call. You came home, packed your stuff, and left. Even though I knew it was what was best for me and your son, I cried. And I cried a lot. I sought help from Devin’s EIP counselor. They helped me through. I am probably a stronger person today because you’re an alcoholic and don’t see it as a problem. It’s okay...and I’m okay too. And better yet, so is MY son.


Journaling: You rarely told me you loved me and now I know why.
Just because I was born from your womb does not mean that an instant loving bond could be created.
I remember those long lonely night of pain you left on my body and in my mind.
I remember the Christmas you bought everyone in our lives gifts, but on Christmas morn there was nothing for me. You told me I was a horrible daughter and I deserved NOTHING.
I watched my family smile and open gifts as I sat alone at 12 thinking I must be the worst person ever born to deserve this day.
I wonder why I struggle with self esteem at 35?
Every day I work so hard to erase the pain and destruction you caused. It is working but the ashes remain.
Maybe one day I won't remember the words "I wish I had aborted you" or "You are a filthy little whore".
I hope one day I am able to forget just how much your "LOVE" hurts me.

I cannot believe we only had 2 entries in the last challenge!
Hopefully we have more this time *wink*

On to the winner of the Bo Bunny goodies from Scrappy Jos

Blogger Dawn said...

Here is my layout for this challenge this time. It isn't as dirty as I would have liked it to be.

Please email Carla your information and we will get this package to you right away!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

~Challenge #14 WINNER~

I apologize for being so late in posting the winner
of challenge #14 which is a 50.00 gift certificate to
Keller's Creations.
The winner is....

Blogger Heather said...

Here is my layout

July 29, 2010 6:29 AM

Heather please email Carla your information so she can get you a code for the online store!~


Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Challenge #15

as this month's SPONSOR!

Scrappy Jo's has offered up a fun Bo Bunny KIT
on challenge #15!~
We work hard to make sure you
have prizes to play for so please
do visit Scrappy Jo's!
They also have a blog!

The Games We Play

Games are for children right?
I don't think so!! From the playground and kindergarten to highschool, and beyond...life's little games.
It's so easy to get caught up int emotional games,
material games, and power games as an adult.
This challenge is all about recognizing those games.
Maybe you have relationship that you are always trying to one up
each other? Or you know a friend who is always trying to drag you into their drama.
Whether we like to admit it or not, every day we face some sort of game.
So go scrap it
Now go get DIRTY!

Here is what the AMAZING DT did to inspire YOU!



Journaling: I'm grown, mature, sophisticated, classy, and I don't have time for Games.

it reads:
i don't like being in anyone's drama
you know the he said she said drama
because in the end someone gets hurt
plus i believe drama is created by those who have low self esteem
and those that are dramafree have a better success with friends


Journaling: I realize it is part of having a child and raising you to do the right thing, but there are days when these mind games we play are just enough to do me in. I say no and you do it anyway. You are learning you can’t get away with it, but the hardest part is actually teaching you that. I have to come up with new ways to teach you each and every day. And you come up with new ways to push the limits each day too. Some days I want to give up and bang my head on the wall, but I resist and hope that eventually I will get through to you!

I just don’t deal well with DRAMMA.
I hate playing games, I am me simply me
And that is all.
It’s ok to dislike me, but going out
Of your way to let me know.
I don’t play that game.
I would never in a million years
Think to go out of my way to let someone
Know I disliked them. I am way too kind
To do that to someone just because I
Love drama, heck it isn’t even DRAMA
It’s pure DRAMMA.
My life is full and rich because I ignore
Those games and I will not be sitting at
50+ playing those games, I will be sitting
With my family *God willing* watching my
Grandchildren and spreading the love.
Those hateful games won’t be in my life
No matter how many try to drag me into
Theirs. It’s all about staying true and
Putting out kindness and love.
I firmly believe if you put out love, you
Receive love in return, those few sour
People won’t ruin it with “Foolish Games”

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Challenge #13 WINNER~

Hi everyone, I am back from Chicago
and CHA, sorry for the delay in picking a winner!

I have not forgotten about you, just been so incredibly busy

The winner is...

Blogger Gina said...

I love the challenge :) Here is my post...

Gina please email Carla and she will get the information to you and to Keller's Creations You have just won a 50.00 Gift Certificate!!!! WOOHOO!!!

Don't forget there is still time for challenge #14!!!!